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Antarctic climate scientists finally return: ABC covers for the $2.4m failure. Speedy’s epic poem

Posted By Joanne Nova On January 22, 2014 @ 2:25 pm In Global Warming | Comments Disabled

A boat full of climate scientists and their adoring media entourage got stuck in sea-ice in Antarctica on Dec 24th, and they’ve finally made it back to Australia on Jan 21st.

The ABC PR machine covers for their embarrassment — lest anybody think that climate scientists might be clueless. In the ABC’s world an “Australian Research Team” with “60 scientists” left because “scientists believe there is evidence of climate change.” After they got stuck in ice they didn’t predict, and looked like partying fools on an ill-prepared junket, the magic wand of ABC-apologia stopped using the term “climate” and they underwent a magical transformation to become a “Russian Passenger Ship“.

The sudden lack of accurate reporting was all the more strange given that the ship and the icebreaker had a dedicated on-board media team from BBC World News, the Guardian, and Fairfax news. They had media on satellite connections, but probably needed meteorologists on it instead.

Repeat after me, The media IS the problem. If reporters were reporters instead of political activists, $1.5 million dollar junkets to promote climate scares would not be approved in the first place. Total cost of this mission now could be almost $4m:

“Director Tony Fleming says the total bill (for the rescue) could be as high as $2.4 million.”

No one is sure who will be paying for the rescue. It depends on insurance clauses. But we all know who pays a billion dollars a year to be fed climate spin.

For those who appreciate poetry, the infamous Speedy has penned an Antarctic epic.

Mawson’s Spirit Gets Right of Reply.

There seems no shortage, nor a dearth, of those who plan to save the earth;
Christopher Turney, (“That’s Professor, thanks”), felt the need to join their ranks,
So he organised his own crusade, somewhat pricey, mostly paid,
By largesse of the public purse – not the last time, nor the first.

His purpose and his noble goal – to sail towards the Southern Pole,
To collect, collate and then report, all data of the climate sort,
Thus confirming something we all “knew” – the evil role of CO2;
Any changes he would show, compared to Mawson, years ago.

(To raise the profile of his scheme, he passed it off as “Mawson’s Dream”.)
Apart from that, not much to do, just hire a boat with Russian crew,
And, to tabulate the climate ruin, invite some friends and camera crew in;
(These climate types, I don’t know why, are rarely, rarely camera shy.)

The ship sailed southward, out to sea, and all was going, swimmingly,
However, as the South Pole beckoned, a fact arose; no-one had reckoned;
For, despite what they’d all been told, the South Pole still was JOLLY COLD!
And, nearly 60 k’s away from shore, the ship was blocked, could go no more.

Chris gazed upon the icy sea; “We’ll disembark, – just follow me,
To explore the ice; this will be awesome – we’re gonna do a Dougie Mawson!”
So the kiddies all got off and played, but, tragically, they overstayed;
For when they returned, the time had passed – the ship by now was stuck and fast!

These latest antics off the coast, had worn quite thin with Russian host;
To Chris he cried: “You stupid jerk! You’ve cost me time and lots of work!
I’m sure you thought it would be nice, to take that frolic on the ice;
You came back late, now, thanks to you, my ship is firmly in the pooh.”

“Your mission’s goal was crystal clear – you had but just the one idea,
To preen and ponce, pontificate, while playing judge to mankind’s fate;
And earnestly parade your views, while looking good for camera crews -
But I’d be more impressed, my climate chap, if you’d learnt to read a weather map!”

“You’re very wrong, my Russian friend, for I know how this will end -
The climate models clearly show, a future lack of ice and snow,
And while models may be thin on proof, we treat them as the Gospel truth,
So therefore soon, perhaps today, we’ll free this ship and sail away.”

Three days later…

But cold it was, and stuck they stayed – a few were getting quite dismayed:
“Oh won’t you come and save us please – we’d much prefer not stay and freeze -
And, if your ship burns fossil fuel, it’s quite OK, we’re really cool.”
Our icebound heroes were at wit’s ends, and sent some “selfies” to their friends…

That evening…

After dinner, and a well-aged red, Chris did toddle off to bed,
He pondered the ship’s immobile status, (it could only be a mild hiatus),
And what would Deniers have to say, as they saw that ice just melt away -
So he dreamed his dream, as he closed his eyes, of that long-awaited Nobel Prize…

He awoke at midnight, and became aware, of the ghost which stood in silence there,
With his slimy green skin and his icy cold breath – this guy was having a lousy death,
And was not at all a happy ghost, being most abrupt towards his host;
“Wakey, wakey, Climate Priest – you know how it is with us deceased,

Turning up at awkward hours, invoking all our spooky powers;
Groaning and moaning and delivering lectures, that’s afterlife for all us spectres,
Floating on air along the halls, then disappearing through the walls;
But, I think you’ll find me extra awesome – for I am the ghost of Douglas Mawson!

And I, myself, have something new – a few “ideas” I feel that you,
Would be advised quite full and well, to remember, recollect and tell
Your colleagues of a similar ilk, those who lie and cheat, defraud and bilk.
For I am annoyed at you, to say the least – you’ve cheesed me off, you Climate Priest!

One hundred years ago, nigh on the day, I steamed my boat into this Bay,
And, well before your climate “crisis”, we landed where the coast was iceless.
Now, this self-same spot, post global “warming”, is blocked by all the sea-ice forming,
So, despite the “wisdom” of your creed, the facts, it seems, have disagreed.

But facts are dull and oh so dreary – they contradict your precious theory,
But you climate chaps know what to do – you implement a “trick” or two,
To “educate” the public mind, and, (for causes of this noble kind),
You deem deception just and right. (All lies by Greens are small and white.)

As an example use this present case, this very boat, this very place,
Locked in ice you thought had melted; your theory, sir, I say, is belted!
But that conclusion would not do! It contravened your point of view -
So, with sophistry and convolution, you ascribe both hot AND cold to man’s pollution!

But your argument now is quite absurd – it’s nothing more than bovine merde -
Then, to show how much you just don’t know – you change your story as you go,
And to ensure the public understands, you raise your voice and wave your hands;
You thus escalate the public fears, and gain approval from your peers.

But the fact remains, you can’t disguise – that what you speak are porky pies,
As has been done, times countless past, by those of upper climate caste,
Lies of fact, lies of exclusion, lies of logic, lies of collusion,
Are stock in trade for a thieves’ alliance – but they have no place in open science.

If you know your facts and have the proof – it’s very easy, just tell the truth –
But if you’re any less than total Francis, you have to go and take your chances,
With cons and shams and tricks and cheats, hockey stick graphs and missing heats -
And oh what a tangled web we do weave, when first we practice to deceive!

You blazed your path to fame and glory, by telling less than half the story,
And if ever there was room for doubt, you’d skip the bits you wanted out,
To reach the sure and safe conclusion, approved and blessed with team collusion;
And though you’re just a phoney prophet, you somehow get your jollies off it.

Half-baked theories and utter twaddle, you embed these in a “climate model”,
While your “settled science” – that proud consensus – is a roll-call of the vain pretentious,
Your fellow travellers, who so richly gain, from coasting on this gravy train.
But when your friends are wrong – which is hardly new – you label it as “Peer Review”.

All these shams and fakes and little tricks, they’re not science, they are politics,
But what I find is really lame – you do these things and use my name,
As if to suggest or imply, of course, that I would support or like endorse,
You, your theory, or your acts, which both hide the truth and twist the facts.

So I’d thank you please, in future verbals, invoke the name of Joseph Goebbels.”

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